Enjoy the ride, y'all!
Come on down to the Mullet Fest for a hootin' good time! Enjoy an array of activities such as the beverage pong tourney, fishin' tourney, pumpkin chunkin' contest, hot dog eatin' contest, tater sack races, and other fun games.
We'll have a stage for local performances and awesome musical acts. Also, plenty of delicious fried food options at Flo's Fried Palace. Plus, you can get a mullet cut and take home souvenirs from our vendors, such as Tats and Tiaras, to remember the day. So come on down for a day of good old-fashioned country fun!
henpecked junction's neighborhoods:
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Are you country enough for Mullet Fest?
Country life can be downright enviable, as most folks have a strong sense of community, make unbreakable bonds as friends, have an undeniable work ethic, and are survivalists that enjoy the good things about living in this world. Country folk are prideful and will do anything to care for their family and friends - pure altruists and natural philanthropists. When they do good in life - so do those around them. They know how to live off the land and be one with nature, enjoying the simple things, and never sense the urge to compete with the Joneses.
Answer the 12 questions below and tally up your scores.
Question 1:
Are you a city mouse or a country mouse?
0 points: City for my whole life.
3 points: Grew up in the city but now live in the country.
7 points:Grew up in the country, but now reside in the city.
10 points: Country for my whole life, baby.
Question 5:
At what age did you learn to drive a stick?
0 points: What's a stick?
1 point: I never learned.
3 points: I was over 15 years old.
7 points: 11-14 years old.
10 points: 1-10 years old.
Question 9:
How terrified would you be if you were in the middle of a forest alone at 3 AM?
0 points: Terrified and expecting to die.
3 points: I would be nervous, but optimistic.
7 points: I wouldn't be scared. I'd be annoyed that bad life decisions landed me there.
10 points: I'd thank my lucky stars I was there so I wouldn't have to hear my Granny snorin.'
Question 2:
Have you owned a gun rack?
0 points: No, never had one and have no use for it.
3 points: I've always wanted one, but never owned one.
7 points:I used to have one, but don't have one now.
10 points: Um, yes. I've always had a gun rack, who doesn't?
Question 6:
How often do you recreationally hunt?
0 points: I've never hunted.
3 points: I've hunted for small things like turtles but never killed anything.
7 points: 1-6 times/year
9 points: 7-12 times/year
10 points: All the time
Question 10:
Which would you prefer to listen to?
0 points: Symphony, EDM, or classical music
1 point: Rap, punk, or pop music
3 points: New country music, like Luke Bryan
7 points: Heavy metal rock
10 points: Country - but not that new-fangled try to pass off as country.
Question 3:
Do you wear camo clothing?
0 points: No. Don't even own any camo - it's tacky.
3 points: I wear camo 1-7 times per year.
7 points: I wear camo more than 8 times per year.
10 points: I wear camo at least once per week - if not every day. Never know when I'm gonna go hog huntin.'
Question 7:
Which appeals to you most:
0 points: Martini
3 points: Craft Beer
5 points: Natty Light
7 points: Johnny Walker Red
9 points: Busch Beer
10 points: Moonshine
Question 11:
Hank Williams Jr. or Sr.?
0 points:Who are they?
3 points: I know who they are and can't stand their music.
7 points: Sr.
8 points: Both of 'em.
10 points: Why you asking that dumb question? It's obviously Hank, Jr.
Question 4:
How far have you traveled from your current residence?
0 points: I've traveled outside of the country.
3 points: I've been to another state.
7 points: 10-30 miles away to an adjacent town. They have great fried gator at their diner.
10 points: Have not ventured outside of the county lines.
Question 8:
Have you ever hurled your body at something to break it?
0 points: NO! That's dumb.
3 points: When I was a child, by accident.
7 points:When I was a child/teen - on purpose.
10 points: Yes. I do it all the time. Table Divin' is fun.
Question 12:
Have you ever shot a beer can?
0 points: That's savage behavior. NO!
3 points: No, but I've shot a gun, but only at a range or through my job.
7 points: No, but have shot at a DIY target, such as a watermelon.
10 points: Obviously. Who hasn't?
SCORE YOURSELF! ARE YOU COUNTRY ENOUGH?
0 - 15 POINTS: CITY-SLICKER ROYALTY You are so city that your Italian leather shoes aren't even scuffed on the soles. Shucks! That's too bad for you. It would be best to study some slang and customs before the party, buy a camo muscle T, and scarf down some venison chili. If you go to Mullet Fest in your current state - you will stand out like a shiny blue Fiat 500.
16-36 POINTS: WAYNE OR WANDA WANNABE You've put your toes in the mud, but if a crawdad crawled out of his burrow with his pinchers flexed, you'd run off screamin' to your mother. You have just enough country in you to be confused about why that happened. Study up, city slicker.
37-59 POINTS: HARRY OR HANNAH HALFLING You're enough country to get by, but your true city-slicker colors will shine through when surrounded by country folk. You won't be able to fake it for long, so you better study and learn how to blend in.
60-99 POINTS: WILLIE'S FISHIN' BUDDY You are country enough to make it through Mullet Fest. Whew. No need to study up - you've got enough country roots that you won't blow away in a Redneck tornado. But it wouldn't hurt to listen to a marathon of Hank Williams Jr. before Mullet Fest - just to be sure you've suppressed all your city vibes.
100-115 POINTS: REDNECK'S COURT JESTER Well, bless your heart. You are country as all get out. You are associated with redneck royalty, but not part of the fam, as you do have a tinge of city-clicker runnin' through your veins. Nonetheless, you'll take home many awards Mullet Fest has to offer. That is, unless a member of Redneck Royalty is in your presence.
117- 120 POINTS: REDNECK ROYALTY You deserve a crown made of beer cans and deer antlers. You are downright amazing, the party star and everybody loves, reveres, and wants to be you. You will rule Mullet Fest.
